The Amazing Transformation Of A Sue
by Perryels
Summary: A Sue has dropped from the sky and is seeking help from the Vongola? GASP. How are they possibly going to do that? – by UN-Sue-ing her! -Discontinued.
1. Chapter 1

**So I've been dying to post up a KHR fic but never really got a chance to until now!**

**I got this idea after reading a bunch of Mary Sue parodies (which some I found were really funny) and I decided to do my little own version of it –****_if you can turn something into a Sue, why not _****UN****_-Sue them? _****And so the birth of this story…**

**Experimental, since it's my first time trying my hand at something like this. Hopefully I was able to grasp the whole 'Mary Sue' concept right.**

**Obvious parody, ridiculous humour, and crack-filled. Enjoy to the EXTREME~**

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**The Amazing Transformation Of A Sue**

. . .

**1. Unidentified Crashing Sue**

_It was yet another ordinary day…_or was it?

A hard strike on the head sent Sawada Tsunayoshi, "Tsuna", flying across the room and waking up from his peaceful slumber. He winced in pain as he lay scrambled on the floor, and later on realized that there was a baby standing right in front of him, a menacing smirk forming on his lips as he clutched a large green mallet in one of his tiny hands. But Tsuna looked passed him ('cause you know, being hammered almost to the verge of death and being sent flying across the room was the ordinary way to wake up) and saw the clock instead.

Oh no! He was going to be late! Tsuna zoomed out of his room and out of the house, a slice of bread magically appearing in between his lips, and his clothes magically changing from his nightwear to his school uniform – 'cause, you know, that's the _ordinary_ way to have breakfast and change clothes.

On the way, Tsuna had encountered his ever loyal 'right-hand man', Gokudera, greeting him with an optimistic "Good morning, tenth!" Tsuna smiled while another one of his friends, Yamamoto, tagged along as he came out from some corner of the street.

"Oi, Tsuna!" He beamed, swinging his bag to his back.

"I told you to keep your distance from the tenth!" Gokudera spat, taking out a few from the many dynamites he kept hidden under his blazer.

"Easy, Gokudera! We don't want to get in trouble!" Tsuna pleaded. Gokudera was quick to comply and discarded the dynamites by throwing it somewhere far away, which caused it to explode anyway and set fire to whichever sorry house he threw it at.

Tsuna sighed hopelessly.

Suddenly, in the middle of their talking/slash/bickering and walking, the most _NOT_ so ordinary thing happened!

Out of the blue, blue and slightly cloudy sky was a thing! A thing that was falling rather rapidly towards them. It started out as small pointy end of a needle, but as it got nearer and came down faster, it started to become like a big ball of fire.

Tsuna started to panic.

Gokudera and Yamamoto were too engrossed in their sudden argument on which bread condiment tasted best (tomato sauce or wasabi) to even notice –_wait, what?_

It speeded its way even closer towards them, and while the other two seemed to be oblivious to what was happening, Tsuna was already saying his final prayers before meeting his doom.

When surprisingly – and much to Tsuna's relief, the thing that fell out from the sky didn't crash and kill him. But instead it ever so gently landed in front of them, like it hadn't been speeding by a hundred miles per second… like it had deified the laws of gravity. All fire seemed to have exhausted from it. As the wind blew the ashes from its top surface, it is revealed that it wasn't a ball at all! It was an oblong! And it was covered in pure white feathers that resembled the feathery wings of an angel.

To their utter surprise, it _did_ seem to be an angel!

The wings opened gracefully and elegantly, spreading wide across Namimori to the other side of town. And between said wings was a dangerously bright light that would blind anyone in its path. Tsuna, Gokudera, and Yamamoto squinted their eyes at the sudden radiance. But they didn't fail to notice the angelic figure that stood before them.

From a motion of her long, slender arm, the pair of wings vanished in a twirl of gold and silver mist.

The boys stood there, mouth agape at the person/creature/whatever it was. She was very, very, _very_ beautiful that with a goddess-like beauty of hers', earthly eyes are not worthy enough to set their gaze at her.

"Hello, earthly beings…" She greeted like the foreigner she was with her eight-octave high voice, and despite how seriously annoying it sounded, she was excused from it because of her wonderful charm, for she was allowed to be an airhead and be charming at the same time.

Her smile was worth a thousand miles to be seen. She bobbed her head to the side in a friendly manner, her stunning hair following the course of the movement the way perfect hair should.

Oh, but the perfectness of her hair could not be simply described as _"strikingly impressive especially in beauty or excellence"_ (as said according to the dictionary), its whole essence had to be noticed too. The color was in the _perfect_ remedy between virgin snow white (or was it dainty silver?) and fresh lilac, and it fell stylishly from her scalp to her butt, the ends curling like the gentle waves of an ocean.

"My name is Manami Xochiquetzal Qetesh Cliodhna Bastet Aphrodite Lada Oshun," she said. "And I have a problem…" Suddenly, her voice sounded forlorn and it now resembled the harmony of a choir of weeping angels singing a very sad song.

"With what just happened? It really _does_ look you have a problem…" Gokudera stated arms across his chest as he raised an eyebrow at its oddity. "But this is amazing!" He exclaimed, interest boiling up inside of him as he further put his mind to it. "A newfound creature! You don't seem to be human at all!"

Tsuna snapped out a little while later when he realized that his socks were wet – and apparently from the small puddle of drool that came dripping from his open mouth. He disgustedly wiped the bottom of his lip with his sleeve.

"I'm not a creature," she replied, offended – hurt as if she had been shot to the heart. "My name is Manami Xochiquetzal Qete-"

"We heard you the first time!" Gokudera spat matter-of-factly, cutting her off.

"Good. Then please address me that way…" She said sounding satisfied that they were actually paying attention. They had to though since _she_ was the center of attention after all.

"Manami Xo…asdfghjkl…" Yamamoto tried, but couldn't get the pronunciation quite right. "Your name is kinda hard to say! Any nicknames?" He asked, laughing sheepishly.

"Manami would be just fine." She informed. "Or any name which counterpart is beauty like the rest of my names!"

"Manami… So you said you had a problem?" Tsuna wondered as he looked at her.

"Ah yes!" She exclaimed clasping her hands together as if she momentarily forgot about it and remembered suddenly. "Alas, for one day I was merrily wandering around the heavens, when suddenly, without noticing I fell into a gaping hole in the clouds!" A spotlight from out of nowhere focused on her as she fell to the ground theatrically, raising a weary arm over her head. "…and I found my pretty little self here. I must get back from where I belong!"

A crowd of people from some random place started cheering, applauding, and calling out her ridiculously long name. _"Encore! Encore!"_

The girl stood up, smiling her award-winning smile, and thanked the audience as she curtsied and waved her hands and sent flying kisses. _"Thank you, thank you. I love you all!"_

"Uh… What was that?" Gokudera asked puzzled as he turned to the equally puzzled Tsuna. Tsuna shrugged.

There was silence as everything reverted back to the original scene. But the silence was soon breeched when Yamamoto's loud laugh sounded. "You're one funny person! And a great magician too! How'd you even manage to pull off stuff like that?" He said as he completely disregarded the abnormality that had just happened, thinking how it was all, you know, 'magic'.

"But… It wasn't magic!" The pretty girl convinced.

"You idiot!" Gokudera added after her, slapping the back of Yamamoto's head. "I'm pretty sure that this was no trick. I think I've read about this somewhere before…" Gokudera explained with scepticism, putting on his glasses and adjusting it just above the bridge of his nose.

"You know about this?" Tsuna had a curious expression. "Could it possibly be an UMA?" He asked.

"I'm not quite sure, tenth. This creature is way too…" Gokudera glanced at the girl.

She stood there innocently in her silky white dress that outlined her slimmer than a model and bustier than Betty Boop figure. Her hair was still beautiful. And her eyes… Her eyes were like windows to a different dimension, as if you'd lose your way by merely staring at them. They shined like a brilliant star, even more that they were in a magnificent shade of gold – it looked far more valuable than the element itself.

"Gokudera? Hey, Gokudera!" Tsuna shook the bedazzled Gokudera when he noticed that he'd stopped explaining in mid-sentence. "GOKUDERA!" He screamed this time, right in Gokudera's ear.

"Tenth! Yes! I'm here!" Gokudera sputtered after finally being able to snap from his trance. "Oh! As I was saying… this… species… is way too _perfect_ to be an UMA."

"Then what could it be?" Yamamoto asked.

"We'll have to find out…"

"So that means you'll help me with my problem?" The girl, clearly not paying attention to the conversation, interrupted.

"We… we'll see what we can do…" Tsuna said, unsure of this decision. The girl smiled blissfully.

And so with the resolve to find out what _she_ may be, the gang had set out to the public library to do some research. And hopefully wouldn't encounter a certain skylark as they made their way. After all, they _were_ skipping class.

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**This was tons of fun to write so I hope you guys had enjoyed reading! Send me what you think. Love, hate, whether I should continue it or not. Constructive criticism. You know the drill.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed, alerted, and faved my story. I'm really happy! Your positive feedbacks motivate me.**

**Oh, and for those of you who are wondering what I meant by 'unSue-ing the Sue', this chapter should explain it.**

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**The Amazing Transformation Of A Sue**

. . .

**2. Assessing the Sue**

"I was right!" A number of heads turned to Gokudera as his loud and excited voice echoed throughout the place. They shot him some dirty looks for his ruckus then got back to whatever they were doing.

Gokudera shifted his eyes away from the computer screen to look at Tsuna and Yamamoto, who were anxiously waiting for the acquired information about the creature they were unlucky enough to have stumbled upon. "It's not an UMA," Gokudera stated seriously.

"It's not?" Tsuna and Yamamoto said in unison, surprised. Then Tsuna added, "Then what else could it possibly be?"

Gokudera didn't reply just yet. Instead he had yet again faced the computer screen, reading some sort of list as he continued to scroll further down the page. "Hmm… Ridiculously long-ass name; unusual hair color with exceptional eyes to match…" He said loud enough for only his friends to hear. Then Gokudera glanced at the dazzling girl who sat way behind him. "Say…"

The girl vigilantly turned to face him, because she was caring and compassionate enough to spare a little attention to somebody else other than herself. "Hm?"

"How intelligent are you?"

"Well…" She trailed off humbly. Then she began by saying how she's helped some of the smartest scientist from NASA discover a newfound element from a newfound galaxy that can apparently cure any fatal disease. She also came up with the formula E=mc2, and was saddened when Albert Einstein "took the credit" even though he was only "watching from the sidelines". And that she also came up with the concept Sliced Bread by accident while baking a cake that would have supposedly solved world hunger by eating just one slice – you'd be full forever. "…It was supposed to be cake but it turned out to be bread!" She laughed at her "silly" mistake, the sound of her laughter like beautiful chimes in the wind.

"What is this thing?" Tsuna asked, slightly cowering at her bizarreness.

"And she was alive _that_ long?" Yamamoto added in disbelief.

"Right," Gokudera said flatly after she had finished talking. "What about any talents or skills?"

And again, the girl ran her mouth. "I'm amazing at playing the piano, and violin, and trumpet and…" She added a bunch of other instruments. "…at the same time. You know, like a walking orchestra. And I have this natural talent for easily getting along with children. I was so touched when they wanted to replace their real parents for me. Wasn't it sweet?" She said charmingly, her eyes glinting with bliss.

"Yeah…" Yamamoto said.

"Sure…" Tsuna added.

"I also love to bake. And I'm kick-ass fighter during combat and the only reason 'prison' was invented was because criminals wanted to lock themselves away from me because I believe in justice and righteousness."

Gokudera nodded his head, seemingly disinterested in spite of being the one to ask the questions in the first place. Well, anyway… he again faced Tsuna and Yamamoto, who had either fallen asleep or stared off into space.

"Tenth! Baseball nut!" He said and snapped the two out. Gokudera looked at them gravely. "I have gathered some data, and I believe that we have a Mary Sue in our hands."

A loud gasp was heard from the two. Then suddenly, Tsuna paused. "A Mary…who?"

"Mary Sue, Tenth! According to the site _'what's a Mary Sue dot com'_, Mary Sues are very terrifying creatures. One of the most horrible ones out there! They can easily wreck havoc in a perfectly good story and their mere existence can obliterate the original plot by simply hogging all the attention."

"Eek!" Tsuna squealed at the horrifying thought, ignoring the fact that Gokudera was slowly breaking the fourth wall.

"Not only that! They can corrupt anyone's minds, especially ones they choose to be their love interest. So don't let her touch you, Tenth. Don't even make eye contact with her for more than three seconds. It's not safe!" Gokudera warned. "She'll brainwash you with her Sue-rifying powers!"

_So that was probably why we were so mesmerised back then_. Tsuna thought. _And Yamamoto probably wasn't affected because he didn't really pay attention to her like me and Gokudera did… He was too busy thinking it was a magic trick…_

"Tenth, I guess it would be best if we leave her be…" Gokudera suggested as he stood up, ready to leave as soon as he hears the _go_ signal from his boss.

"I- I – " Tsuna stammered, not sure on what to do. After all, she had asked for _their_ help. And because it was in his kind yet naïve nature, Tsuna would be willing to help no matter who or what she was.

"Or maybe we could put her up for auction…" Gokudera had a second thought and sat back down. He lifted a finger to his chin. "Mary Sues _are_ hunted worldwide. How much do you think she'll be worth if we turn her in?"

"Shut up!" Just then, a familiar looking baby had popped out from one of the vents on the ceiling. He roughly jumped over Gokduera's head, causing a red swollen bump to grow on the poor storm guardian's head. Gokudera winced in pain as he rubbed the injured area.

"Reborn!" Tsuna exclaimed as he looked up the too violent baby. "Are you trying to kill him?"

But Reborn only ignored him and started glaring at the three boys. "How could you think that?" He growled, scolding them – mostly at Gokudera for coming up with the ideas. "This lady asked for your assistance and the best way you could think of is to leave her? Wasn't the motto of the Primo to defend the weak?"

"That's right!" Gokudera said suddenly, apologetic, and dropped to his knees to do a dogeza, banging his head repeatedly on the cold tiled floor. "I'm sorry Reborn-san! I was mistaken! I shouldn't have thought of such things!"

"Uh… Gokudera, please get up, people are staring…" Tsuna trailed off nervously, as the same people from before turned their heads at the commotion they were making.

"Dame-Tsuna! What do you plan to do?" Reborn demanded, looking at Tsuna perilously as if he'd shoot the poor boy right then and there if he didn't give out an immediate answer.

And as if Tsuna sensed it (because he damn-right knew that Reborn wouldn't hesitate to actually shoot him) he answered right away. "I- I don't know!" Tsuna screamed out desperately.

"Get a grip on yourself!" And a swat on Tsuna's head – courtesy of Leon's ever-so quick transformation from a chameleon to a fly swatter skills.

Tsuna did as he was told. He took a deep breath in, put a band-aid over his now slightly bleeding head, and turned to face the stunning girl who they had been rudely ignoring for some time now, which they shouldn't be doing because this was _like_, her story, and all attention should be _like_, put on her_._

"Manami Xo… something…" Tsuna stuttered her name, trying to recall what the rest of her names were, but failing to do so. "You said you needed to get back to where you belong. How exactly are we going to send you back to the sky?"

"Well, you _are_ the sky guardian!" She said matter-of-factly. "You think me falling in front of you was a coincidence?"

"Uh, well… Yes?"

"There is one thing…" The girl stood up, crossing her arms over her watermelon-sized chest and began pacing around them, thinking. "I need to find my one and only true love," she said dreamily, her eyes sparkling like a newly shined jewel. "He will be the beacon of light that would lead my way back!"

"Tch. As if that kind of thing would work in this place…" Gokudera informed.

"Oh, you really think that?" She said and leaned down to Gokudera, grabbing his face. "You will like me…" She chanted as she gazed into his eyes.

"I will like…"

"Gokudera!" Tsuna yelped in alarm and pulled the girl away. "You can't do that!"

"Sure I can!" She assured as she dropped Gokudera and headed towards Yamamoto, who cautiously backed away, but was too late when she smiled at him, her sparkly white teeth radiating a hundred kilowatts.

"Gah! My eyes! It burns!" Yamamoto fell back, blocking his eyes from the harsh bright light.

"See, I told you. You can't just make someone like you." And so the expert speaks. 'Cause you know, Tsuna's already won the love of his life with is suave moves – in his dreams, at least.

"Why not?" She said, dumbfounded.

"When you say true love, you don't hypnotize them or blind their eyes! Love must come from the heart. If you want them to love you, they must naturally like you first."

"But, Tsuna, she's anything _but_ natural." Yamamoto stated, lifting himself up after having fallen back.

"Tenth, I think there might be a way." Gokudera announced. "According to the website, this girl here is corrupted with these ridiculous elements that describe a Sue – which is what she turned into now. The Sue is now embedded within her and will forever be a part of her unless some kind of force alters or completely erases that Sue!"

"Uh…" Tsuna said dumbfounded. He never really did understand any of Gokudera's complex explanations. Tsuna just nodded his head like he knew what the storm guardian was talking about.

"To un-Sue the Sue, we must change her, Tenth. _Completely_. We'll make her _less_ perfect. After all, that's what makes Sues, well… Sues. We'll make her normal, and we'll call it _Imperfectionizing the Sue_!" Gokudera proclaimed confidently with utmost enthusiasm.

"_Imperfectionizing_? Is that even a word?" Yamamoto asked sceptically.

"It is now."

"So, did you get it Dame-Tsuna? If you end up transforming her into a normal being, then she could probably be naturally loved and therefore find her way back to the sky. Tsuna! I want you and your guardians to start on this NOW." Reborn commanded.

"R-right!"

And so, the quest to transform the Sue has begun.

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**No, I don't think site stated above a real website. I just randomly made it up. But then again, I haven't tried.**

**AND! I know that the description of a Sue written above might not accurate (Dx I should have probably done more research), but that theory works for the story. I apologize for damaging any brain cells with my awful attempt at explaining.**

**Reviewers won't be swatted by Leon.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Again, I would like to thank everyone who faved and alerted this story, and also **_Amplifyingly Loud_, _Vongola Xerxes_, **and **_PhantasmSakura _**for taking their time to review!**

**Reviews are like my motivational pills so please... review! ****-iz watching you-**

* * *

**The Amazing Transformation Of A Sue**

. . .

**3. 'Imperfectionizing' the Sue**

When Tsuna was finally able to gather all of his guardians – which took quite the effort considering almost getting bitten to death; almost earning a ticket through the Six Paths of Hell; being convinced into joining the boxing club TO THE EXTREME!, yet again; and almost being blown off by a handheld grenade, he started explaining what kind of dire situation he found himself in and, as instructed by Reborn, asked for their help.

"I shall take no part in this." Hibari declared, being the first to speak up. "All this crowding makes me want to bite you all to death…" He added ruthlessly like he always was, and turned around to walk away.

"Hibari-san!" Tsuna panicked, seeing that one of his seven guardians was about to leave, and that won't work because then he'll be left with only six and he needs seven of them and – BAH! You get the point.

"Kufufufu~ this sounds interesting…" Mukuro smirked. "If the creature you speak of is as strong as you said, then I might be able to take control over the world by possessing her…"

"Don't do that!" Tsuna frantically turned towards Mukuro after hearing the suggestion.

"I shall help to the EXTREME!" Ryohei yelled, punching the air with his bandaged knuckles to prove his excitement.

And Lambo… Well, the kid wanted some candy.

"Stupid cow! There's no time for that!" Gokudera scorned at the little boy-cow-thing.

"Now, Gokudera, don't be too harsh…" Yamamoto said, breaking off the child and the teen (who acted like a child).

"QUIET!"

Suddenly, just when Tsuna was on the verge of insanity at the commotion he was trying so hard to control, a loud, high-pitched shriek broke out and everything fell into an immediate silence.

"I mean… please, everyone…"

Instinctively, the boys turned their heads to the source of the voice. And under the shade of the cherry blossom tree, they saw the most beautiful girl they had ever laid their eyes on. She looked charming as always as she gazed at them with her golden orbs, sparkling like the perfect jewels they were. Her lustrous hair fell into place after the passing of the wind, and she tucked some loose strands behind her ear with her ever delicate fingers, before smiling at them, her smile slowly breaking their hearts into a million pieces because of how perfect it looked, but only for the pieces to be mended back together after hearing her angelic voice.

"Cooperate…" She trailed off innocently.

"Oya?" Mukuro's smirk grew wide with interest.

Ryohei's eyes were dinner-plate sized.

Lambo loosened his grip on Gokudera's hair.

Hibari dropped his tonfas.

Tsuna, Gokudera, and Yamamoto: Been there. Done that.

A few moments of silence passed and a wave of realization finally hit them.

"The Vongola was not kidding…" Mukuro trailed off.

"I agree on this one…" Hibari added.

Then it was decided.

"Defeat the evil to the EXTREME!" Yelled Ryohei.

. . .

A glint of moisture of hope and joy shimmered in Tsuna's big owl-like brown eyes. He was thankful enough that his guardians were…_generous_…enough to actually agree with him on the whole Sue problem and help him out… With of course certain conditions that will no longer be discussed due to reason that it doesn't really play a major role in the plot; but if it did, it would most likely involve Tsuna being possessed, Tsuna getting beat up at boxing club, Tsuna getting threatened to be bitten to death if he doesn't scrub the school's bathroom floor, Tsuna spending all his allowance on grape candy, and/or anything that involves abusing the poor Tsuna.

Tsuna sighed haplessly when suddenly a pair of long and slender arms enclosed around him. "I'm so~ happy! Thank you so much for helping me out!" The girl chirped from behind him, and much to Tsuna's male hormones, he started blushing.

"Tenth! I think I know how we can start …Hey! Get off the tenth!" Gokudera said, first turning to Tsuna then to the beautiful creature who Gokudera refused to call by her extremely long name.

"I want my beacon of light, or should I say, lover, to be as cute as the tenth!" She said cheekily.

"Calling the tenth 'tenth'! Why you-!"

A wild Sue appears (to be still clinging to the Tenth)! Gokudera takes out dynamites. Dynamites start exploding. Exploding dynamites scare the Sue and lets go of the tenth. Tsuna is left unharmed. It's super effective!

"So, Gokudera, you were you saying?" Yamamoto brought some time later.

"Oh, yeah… The easy thing we could get started on to Un-Sue her is to imperfectionize the way she looks. Then we could move on to other aspects such as intelligence level, overly-charming personality, and so on…"

"Again with the word?" Yamamoto giggled, referring to the term Gokudera apparently proclaimed as a _real_ word, like he proclaimed himself to be the right-hand man of the Vongola tenth.

"Shut up, baseball nut!"

"How do we begin?" Tsuna asked.

"I know just the thing…"

Some time later, the quartet had found themselves in the familiar Kokuyo land. At least, whatever's left of it…

"Oya? Sawada Tsunayoshi, what matters are you here for?" A surprised mist guardian questioned the group as they entered the vicinity. "I don't recall giving out any invitation for you to barge into my territory like that… But I supposed you're finally willing to let me take over your body?"

"Eek!" Tsuna exclaimed and cowered to the side.

"Hands off the tenth!" Gokudera defended suddenly. "We're not here for you. We're here for Chrome."

"And what do you want with my dear Chrome?" Mukuro asked rather politely, polite in a sense that there would always be that menacing intent present (if that makes sense) because Mukuro liked to mess with your heads, and if you said the wrong answer He'll. Kill. You.

"For this…" From behind, Gokudera pulled out the beautiful girl and shoved…no, rather, _presented_ her in front of Mukuro.

"Ah~ Please be more gentle!" She screamed in a very… suggestive, yet painful manner which resulted in very awkward reactions from the boys. Except Mukuro, 'cause Mukuro can keep his cool 'cause he's awesome like that and the author would NEVER make him fall with the likes of THAT… thing. (Oops. I got carried away.)

Mukuro raised an eyebrow at her and with a devious smirk on his face, had cut her with his trident with his awesome stealth skills and possessed her, all before a second's time.

"Mukuro! The bastard actually possessed her!" Gokudera said in disbelief.

"_Kufufufu…"_

"Manami!" Tsuna exclaimed, saying her name like they've already known each other for years! Note the phony enthusiasm.

"We have to get him out of her quickly!" Yamamoto added.

But before they could actually do anything about it, Mukuro had already been forced out; forced out as if he had been spat out like green peas from a child's mouth.

Eyes widened in shock, Mukuro looked at her horrified. "She is much too strong for me to even handle! What is this thing? Fine. Do as you wish." And with the resolution to keep himself away from a very abnormal creature, Mukuro vanished in a thick blanket of mist, revealing his female counterpart in his stead.

"Boss!" Chrome exclaimed shyly. Tsuna turned to the storm guardian.

"Gokudera?"

"Let the Un-Sueing begin!"

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**Lol. I hinted on Mukuro too much. Sorry! I couldn't help myself.**

**Well! Now that the whole explaining part is over with, the following chapters will FINALLY contain the actual 'Un-Sueing/transformation', so stay tuned!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey, everyone, sorry for the late update. I lazed off on the last part, hence the delay.**

**So, I'm starting to sort of lose interest in this story; first because there are parts that I think are too illogical, which I find difficult to explain. And second, because every time I try to make a new chapter, it just doesn't end up the way I want it to.**

**I'm not planning to give up on this yet, although updates might be slower.**

* * *

**The Amazing Transformation Of A Sue**

. . .

**4. Appearance of the Sue**

"Let the Un-Sueing begin!" Gokudera declared with utter conviction as if he were about to declare a state of war. "Change the Sue's appearance!"

"Oh! Make-overs…" Chrome exclaimed excitedly (if a neutral-looking expression counts as excitement. Because in reality a 'neutral' expression (which is normal for everybody else) is an excited Chrome and an 'excited' expression is a really, REALLY pumped-up, psyched-out, excited Chrome… ya know?)

Because after all, Chrome was a girl, and despite living in a place that was a few more litters from becoming a dump, and with a group of smelly teenage boys (excluding M.M 'cause she was too busy getting worked up with her jealousy of Chrome and Mukuro's closeness to even notice her) Chrome enjoyed these little girly things, even though she was technically about to do it with guys.

"To the salon!" Gokudera commanded after a few moments of the author explaining totally useless stuff later.

And with the super awesome teleportation powers of this story, the group had found themselves, in guess what? A salon! And since the group needed the salon all to themselves to save the trouble of having to explain to everyone what the hell was exactly happening, they found themselves in an _empty_ salon. Completely functional, including all the instruments the group needed for their free use.

(Everything stated above was made possible by the sponsorship of downright ridiculous crack. Terms and conditions may apply.) 

"Wow…" Yamamoto trailed off, absolutely stunned at the whole happening.

"And the thing!" Tsuna added, equally amazed, and lacking any other word for calling the 'thing' anything else but 'thing'. "It was even greater than Byakuran's Flame Ring Teleportation System!"

"Uhm, excuse me. I'm not going to let you change the way I look…" The beautiful girl said from the side, but apparently, the attention wasn't focused on her just yet.

"I know Tenth! We didn't even need to use any dying will flames…" Gokudera said.

"Uh, hello? I said I-!"

"It couldn't have been an illusion…" Chrome interrupted. "Righ, boss? I didn't sense any mist flames…"

"No. I don't think it'd been an illusion…" Tsuna replied.

"OH MY GOSH! SERIOUSLY! I SAID I REFUSE-!" The beautiful girl shrieked and all eyes fell instantly on her. "I mean…" The girl cleared her throat after realizing they were all gawking weirdly at her, like she was stranger than she already was. "…I won't let you do anything with the way I look." She said flatly then smiled in hopes of hiding her embarrassment from her sudden outburst. This girl had some _serious_ mood issues.

"What?" Gokudera said, outraged. "If you want us to help you then you better do as we say!"

"But why? I'm already perfect as I am, and I like it that way!" She said proudly.

"That's the thing! You're _too_ perfect to even be REAL! What part of us making you NOT perfect don't you get?" Gokudera spat.

"Please trust us…" Tsuna said. "We're here to help…" He reassured her and finally, the beautiful girl started to consider.

"Okay, fine." She smiled her star-striking smile. "If the tenth says so…"

There was distaste and confusion in Tsuna's expression, and Gokudera was annoyed.

"Stop calling him tenth!" Gokudera demanded. "Only I can call him tenth!"

The beautiful girl did nothing but snort to Gokudera's reaction. "Why, aren't you being prick?"

"Why you-!"

"Easy, Gokudera!" Yamamoto laughed nervously to ease the detention.

"Yamamoto's right, Gokudera," Tsuna said. "Calm down."

The irritated storm guardian released his balled fist and took a breath, calming down a bit. "Fine. If that's what the tenth wants. But if she goes bald, I have no regrets." A look of shock dawned upon the girl's expression and her eyes widened in horror, jaw dropping as it did.

"Bald?" she yelled, "You can't be serious!"

But Gokudera only ignored her further protests and forced her onto the barber chair (salon chair? Whatever that chair is called). "Now we have to get rid of all this!" He said, lifting up a handful of the girl's precious white-ish, lilac-ish locks, and started snipping it at random with a pair of scissors that was conveniently lying somewhere near him.

And ever so quickly, the long mane grew shorter, and shorter. Gokudera looked rather…_enthusiastic_ at the whole process as he continued to ravage… err, play with… err, trim it.

Tsuna, Yamamoto, and Chrome were looking at Gokudera's work improbably.

"Uh, Gokudera, do you know what you're doing?" Tsuna asked, eyeing some unevenly cut part.

"No." He replied flatly, much to Tsuna's worry.

Chrome had offered to continue the rest of the haircut, unfortunately doing a worse job than Gokudera. She had to use an illusion to cover up some bald parts.

"Oh no! My hair! It's… It's…!" The girl wasn't even able to continue her sentence as she stared at herself in the mirror in horror. "It's all gone!" She cried – so much that it started soaking her top. But even as she was about to flood the place with her never-ending cry, she was ignored by the group as they had some other important matters to attend to, like,

"The color of her hair!" Gokudera exclaimed. "We have to change that too! No normal human would be walking around with that... that… whatever shade of white or purple that is. " He added, lacking the words to describe how perfectly perfect the shade of the beautiful girl's hair was. "Any suggestions?"

"What about pink!" Yamamoto said enthusiastically.

"Pink?" Gokudera protested, obviously disliking the idea. "Are you an idiot? We want to make her look human, not a walking cotton candy."

"What about blue?" Tsuna suggested. There was distaste in Gokudera's expression. He didn't like that one either. But how could he possibly defy his precious tenth?

"Ehm, Tenth, I don't think that's such a pretty color. It's so… weird, and unusual, and…" Gokudera rambled on, insulting the poor color that did nothing to him, until he was cut off by a certain female guardian.

"Gokudera, Mukuro-sama says he heard you…" Chrome informed. Gokudera furrowed his eyebrows.

"Next color?"

"What about purple?" Yamamoto tried again.

"PURPLE?" Now there was an outraged expression plastered all over Gokudera's face. "That's even worse! What kind of person in the right mind would want to choose PURPLE?" He emphasized the words rather strongly to state his point, until he was cut off again.

"Gokudera?"

"What is it this time?" He turned to Chrome who had stared back at him darkly.

"I can hear you." Gokudera flinched. "What about brown like the boss'?" Chrome then suggested, looking back at the rest of the group.

"Yeah! That's a great idea!" Yamamoto declared, smiling happily. Tsuna agreed, and finally, so did Gokudera.

"Okay, we'll go with that…"

"No!" Suddenly, a loud scream halted everyone from any movement other than covering their ears at the sound; and the perpetrator of that eight-octave high, eardrum-shattering shriek came from none other the beautiful girl (…obviously). Ah, looks like she was finally able to get a hold of herself from all that whimpering and crying she did. "I'm not letting you change my hair color! That's final!"

But it was all too late as Gokudera had already dunked in a good amount of brown hair dye over her head, disregarding following any sort of instruction for proper use of the product. And after a few magical seconds later (note that there will be a lot of magic using in this chapter 'cause the sponsors are awesome like that), without even leaving on the product for too long, or rinsing it off, 'cause it magically does that by itself, the girl's hair had turned from white to brown, from roots to tips.

The girl sat there, mouth agape, as she once again took a good look of herself in the mirror. "No, no, no, no! My snow white virgin locks! They're all…muddy snow now!" She whined, touching her feature that used to be her crown and glory. And again, the beautiful started crying. The loss was too much for her, she couldn't bear it. She had to mourn that loss, and as she cried, even the devil had pitied her.

"Why are you crying?" Yamamoto asked, looking down at the girl. "You look like a new person! And that's actually a good thing!" He added enthusiastically, trying to cheer her up.

The girl lit up ever so instantly, and her cries were reduced to sobs. "Really?"

"Yeah." Yamamoto answered honestly.

"Do you love me now then?" She asked with a hopeful look in her eyes.

Yamamoto gave a nervous laugh and replied, "No…"

"Hey! Enough with the sappy stuff!" Gokudera then interrupted. "We're still missing a few things!" Gokudera reached into the very depths of his pocket and magically took out a piece of plastic that seemed to resemble that of contact lens cases. He tossed it to the girl, and she caught it instantly like perfect, swift, agile girls should move.

"What's this?" She asked, looking down at the object she caught.

"Use that to cover up that inhuman eye color of yours…"

It didn't take long for the girl to figure out what it was that she was holding. She stared down at the pair of contact lenses with pure displeasure. "I am not sticking these things into my perfectly delicate eye!" She protested, and got a shot of Gokudera's daggers. She jolted at his stern look and quickly put one contact on each eye, almost poking them with her ever-so stunning and long, finely filed, French-tipped nails.

. . .

Sometime later, the group had found themselves on the mall, going through some clothing stores to find 'normal looking' clothes for the soon-to-be 'normal' person.

Unfortunately, the most abnormal thing had been happening. For some illogical, irrational, unscientific, unexplainable (more redundant words here) reason, none of the clothes seemed to fit. As in, _nothing_ fit. Nothing. Nada. Zero. Zilch. **NOTHING**. I, the author, won't even try to explain it because I myself do not understand this strange occurrence.

"How is this even possible?" Gokudera said shocked for nth time. His mouth fell open again. His eyes were in disbelief again. And he just could not understand it. The girl had yet again stepped out of the fitting room (for god knows how many times now) with a new set of clothes in hand. She shook her head and sighed.

"I told you... Only perfectly custom made clothes would fit my perfectly perfect body. Why don't you get it?" She said _again_ after having been met with the same reaction from Gokudera and the rest. "None of these clothes would fit a perfect figure like me."

"That's just stupid!" Gokudera announced, still being in denial despite the obvious fact.

"As strange as it seems, isn't it true, though?" Tsuna stated. "I mean, she's practically tried every single piece of clothing in every store we've visited, but none of them… _none_… fits her at all."

"Tenth, what do we do now?" Gokudera asked, half annoyed and half dejected at the situation.

"I know!" Yamamoto said suddenly, and turned to the girl with a pineapple shape for a hairstyle. "Chrome, you're the girl here, would you be able to do anything?"

Chrome stared of for a fraction of a second, thinking. Then she snapped her fingers as if she'd figured it out. And without saying anything, she dragged the other girl into the dressing room with her.

There were sounds coming out from that room – sounds that weren't supposed to be heard by young teenagers. Tsuna, Gokudera, and Yamamoto started blushing at those sounds, and as they moved to the door as much as their eager ears wanted them to, the door abruptly opened, and it revealed…it revealed…

The boys' mouth fell agape, and their eyes widened in disbelief and wonder and amazement.

The creature looked completely and utterly different. She no longer looked like the 'perfect' angel being thing from before, now she looked more average than anybody else.

She practically had a makeover from head to toe.

Her used to be white, wavy, long locks were cut until the shoulders, and had been coloured brown. Her golden orbs were masked under the same shade of brown due to contact lenses. Her Betty Boop boobs had shrunken. Her waist was moderate looking and no longer looked like she had a liposuction gone wrong. And finally, the clothes from the store had fit.

All in all, she looked…normal.

"Well? How do I look? I hope you people are satisfied…"

The boys didn't reply. They just nodded. The Tsuna turned to Chrome.

"Chrome, how did you do it? Her shape… You were actually able to do something about it!"

"Well, I…" Chrome trailed off, and as if on cue a guy with a vacuum cleaner had gone passed them, drowning out the discussion from the noise of the appliance.

"Ohhh…" The three boys said in unison.

"Well, now that's done, we can finally move on to more important things…" Gokudera announced a few moment later. "We have to see if we can change her attitude and whatever else that makes her a Sue."

And with that, the group headed off. Who will they be seeking for help next?

"Hey, did you guys pay for these things?" Yamamoto suddenly brought up.

* * *

**I think the first part was okay? I noticed that I'd put in twice the crack in there compared to the other chapters. But I'm not happy with the last part at all. (T-T)**

**What do you guys think? Please review! It really does help with the motivation.**


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